“Go f*&k yourself. You and your disgusting talk of money.
You’re everything that’s wrong with the world!”
That was a real comment under one of my Facebook ads last year.
It was an ad promoting my program Impact™, which is a program
that helps changemakers overcome the obstacles that prevent them
from making more money and more impact in the world with their
You might think I felt offended or upset by this woman’s comment.
Or that I wanted to shrink and never promote this program I deeply
believe in, ever again.
A part of me did feel like hiding.
But luckily, I didn’t shrink.
In fact, once I took a deep breath I felt so grateful for her.
Because in that moment she shone a light on something that I knew
would become one of my great “missions” in life.
Healing the wound we have around money & spirituality.
As I read that woman’s comment, I could feel how deeply triggered
she was around money. I went to her Facebook profile and found it
full of beautiful posts about spirituality and serving the world.
It was clear she and I both held the same beliefs about serving others
with our gifts–yet here she was equating me to some slimy, smarmy,
devoid-of-soul person who only cared about money.
That used to be one of my worst fears–that someone would think of
me that way, when all I wanted to do was help.
As I re-read the comment, my inner Seer could see right through to the
deep wound she had around money.
She was triggered by my suggestions that serving the world could also mean that you make good money, because she had her own fears and limiting beliefs about money and spirituality.
It’s a toxic belief that I see all the time as I work with change-makers who feel
called to serve the world positively with their businesses.
We seem to collectively think that money and spirituality
are like oil and water–they cannot mingle.
I get it. I used to think the same thing.
When I first started my business I felt so weird asking people to pay me.
I genuinely wanted to help them, could see that our work together would
have a positive effect on their lives and my heart was bursting to serve…
It was just the “asking for money” bit that felt weird.
Would they think I was a sleazy marketer for posting about my program?
Would they think I didn’t really care about them if I charged them money for the
help I offered?
Isn’t it somehow more “spiritual” to do everything for free and for the
reward to be the smile on the person’s face when you help them?
Didn’t Jesus, Gandhi or Mother Theresa, the change-makers I most
admired, do that?
Aren’t you supposed to give up money and live a totally ascetic
lifestyle in order to be truly “enlightened” and “spiritual”?
Well, I tried that.
And months later I was stressed out, unable to pay my bills,
feeling so stressed and depleted from worrying about money,
that I couldn’t really create anything that would be of help to
It was after my fourth consecutive week of having to buy ramen for
breakfast, lunch and dinner and listening to my alcoholic, chain-smoking
abusive neighbors in my low-rent apartment building have a massive
blow-out, that I realized…”there’s got to be a better way”.
I wasn’t actually helping anyone because I was struggling to survive.
I was depressed and I couldn’t coach any clients properly when my
neighbors decided to have a huge fight and you could hear it through
my walls and on my phone call with my client.
But at the time, it was the only place I could afford to live.
My focus was so much on survival and I was so stressed all the time
that I wasn’t able to do my best work.
Luckily, I found that better way.
I now run a multi-six figure business that has helped over 5,000
change-makers make a real impact in the world with their great work,
without having to feel slimy, smarmy or like a sell-out.
I believe in this so much that I even created a program called
“Fearless Selling™” out of these realizations (and I’m happy to report
that my clients collectively brought in $3 million in revenue in soul-aligned
businesses last year due to that little program!)
And I’m sharing that “better way” with you today, because one of the biggest
things that gets to me is seeing change-makers with brilliant ideas, with a
deep desire to truly change the world, hold themselves back because of the
You cannot serve the world if you’re held back!
We have a huge wound in our collective around money.
Right now, think of the top “negative” things you were taught about money.
(“Money is the root of all evil”, “money is hard to come by”, “people with a lot
of money are selfish and don’t care about the poor”, “money makes you greedy”,
those were some of the things I “learned” about money growing up).
Look at your list now and see what story it tells you about money.
Is it any wonder that woman left that comment under my Facebook ad?
I don’t blame her, considering that we are constantly taught to have a
negative emotional charge around all things money-related.
I cannot tell you how passionate I have felt about healing this collective
wound around money ever since that woman commented under my ad.
So if you’re struggling with the money piece in the good work you do
in this world (or feel called to do in the world), here are 3 things that prove
that money can be spiritual and soul-aligned…
because it’s time we begin to heal this wound once and for all.
1. You cannot help anyone if you can’t help yourself first
I had a client once, let’s call her Anna, who was a very talented healer
and psychic. Her work with people was incredible–she had the capacity
to heal people of lifelong physical ailments, help them get pregnant after
years of trying unsuccessfully, help people find missing relatives and more.
Yet, she came to work with me because she was miserable.
She was chronically undercharging and giving away services for free
because she felt bad for people who couldn’t afford it.
The result of all of this was not that “their smiles were all the reward she
Actually, she was chronically fatigued, was developing some serious health
problems that required hospitalization and was stressed out all the time about
making her rent. With not enough money coming in, she wasn’t even sure
she would be able to afford the procedures she needed to feel better.
She told me when we first spoke that she felt like she would die
if she kept this up.
Is this really the way to change the world?
If you have a calling to change the world with your unique gifts, what good
do you think you will be to the world if you’re so exhausted from overworking
to bring in enough money that you cannot get out of bed, or worse, dead?
I know it’s kind of blunt, but when I told Anna this, she realized how true
this was. As we worked together, she doubled her prices, cut out the
pro-bono clients and in a matter of months she was feeling better.
She was now making two times the amount of money she was before,
had more free time on her hands for self care and for LIVING her life
and her work with her clients was better than ever because she was
nourished, happy and inspired.
She had so much time now that she was able to get to writing her book
and her blog posts–which allowed her to impact a larger amount of people
who may not be able to afford her 1:1 services.
She now makes enough money that she has the time to offer pro-bono
sessions to people once a month.
Lesson: you cannot help others if you’re stressed out and depleted. Like the airplane safety manuals say–put your own oxygen mask on first!
As a fellow spiritual person, I get it that when we view things from a higher
plane, money has no true meaning and “it’s all energy” and “doesn’t matter”.
But we also live in a world where things cost money.
Things like food, a trip to a beautiful place that leaves us inspired, or that
course we would like to take to increase our skill set and help others in
bigger and better ways.
And as we grow our businesses, we have to invest in things that cost
money so we can get our message out there in bigger ways and help
more people than ever.
All of these things cost money.
2. Spirituality & Money have always co-mingled
One of the most common things I hear when I try to show people that
money is not “evil” or inherently “un-spiritual” is that people like Jesus or
Mother Teresa didn’t have a lot of money, yet they did a lot of good work
in the world.
That’s actually total BS.
Some spiritual leaders may choose to take on ascetic lifestyles, but that
doesn’t mean they don’t make any money or don’t need it.
In fact, Mother Theresa regularly traveled to petition millions of dollars
for her charity, which she received. Those donations were what helped her
make a big impact in the world with her work and help many people.
Her charity was just as much of a business as any other business out there.
Jesus had many wealthy benefactors that helped him further his mission
of compassion and healing the sick & poor.
So this “myth” that money and all things spiritual don’t mix is total hogwash.
If we want to get “spiritual” for a moment–consider this:
Nothing in this world has any meaning other than the one we assign to it.
A chair is only evil if we say it’s evil.
And very often objects or people will take on the qualities that WE
assign to them.
Money is a piece of paper.
It is not inherently “evil” or “non-spiritual”.
A piece of paper can’t be evil or saintly.
We choose what we want to do with that piece of paper and what energy we want to infuse it with.
So if you don’t want money to be “evil”, do good things with it like Mother Theresa
and Jesus did. Period.
As I mentioned in the first point above–reaching large amounts of people
with your business so that you can help them, costs money.
That’s making and then spending money to do good things in the world.
Use money for good and money will be a very “spiritual” practice.
3. “Selling” is not a dirty word–it’s a deep service to the world.
Most people who feel called to be of service with their businesses,
and are soul-centered, cringe a little bit internally when they hear
the word “selling”.
And I don’t blame you if you feel a little weird about that word.
We have had many examples of people who were not heart-connected
manipulating and tricking people into buying things that did not deliver
on their promises.
We even have a term for it: “snake oil salesman”.
So it doesn’t surprise me that “selling” gets a bad rap and is associated
with inauthenticity, dishonesty and stealing people’s money.
I have worked with so many entrepreneurs who have a world-changing
idea that is just sitting around collecting dust because they have such
deep resistance to “selling” their idea, program or product.
One thing I teach to my clients all the time is that we are powerful creators.
We get to choose to create our experience for the most part.
So, just like in point #2 above, we can make “selling” evil or good.
It’s your choice.
You don’t have to “sell” like the people out there who sell in a way that
feels out of alignment or sleazy.
You can define your own version of “selling”.
(That’s exactly what I did when I created my Fearless Selling™ course)
So let’s take a moment to redefine “selling”, okay?
Selling is merely letting people know what you’re up to in the world
and inviting them in to have an incredible, life changing experience
When you “sell” someone you are offering them a potentially life changing service.
It’s as simple as that.
You don’t have to do anything creepy or manipulative when you have
attracted the right potential client.
All you have to do is share from your heart, the work that you so
deeply believe in.
Your passion is what will “sell” them anyway.
So let’s reclaim the word “selling” once and for all, shall we?
It doesn’t serve you or the world to hold back from telling people
about your incredible products and ideas, because you have one
silly belief about “selling” being a dirty word.
If no one knows about what you do, then you aren’t really serving
the world are you?
All you’re really doing then is sitting at home, being “judgy” about the word “selling”
and no one gets to benefit from the powerful work that only YOU
can do on this entire planet & universe.
So, I’d love to know in the comments below, what are your most negative
beliefs on money, selling & spirituality? And how has this post helped
you to turn those around today?
I love hearing from you!
PS: I haven’t had private clients now for over 2 years. Recently I felt a
calling to open up my calendar for only TWO private 1:1 coaching clients.
If you’re feeling called to work with me privately on building your soul-aligned
business, you can click here to apply. Once we receive your application and
you’re accepted, my team member Michelle will reach out to schedule a chat
and share all the details.
Please note: this is only for truly motivated change-makers who are ready
to make a real investment in their dream in 2015 and who are prepared to
experience lightning speed growth. If that’s you, click here to apply now.
First come, first-served.