I haven’t written you in 2 weeks.
The truth is simple.
I didn’t want to.
This last year was an incredible year.
(I’ve been writing an epic 2013-in-review post for the past 2 months. I’m releasing it soon in a series of posts. I can’t wait to share it. It’s packed full of value, life lessons and hysterical stories).
In the beginning of the year, I sold everything I owned. I chose the nomadic life, venturing off with nothing but 2 suitcases and my dog. My business hit multiple six-figures. I launched a new program IMPACT (to amazing success and raving reviews from the participants.)
I witnessed huge breakthroughs in the lives and business of my clients (all thanks to VIP Intensive Days and my 2013 Fearless Feminine Leader™ Mastermind). This group of 6 women blew the roof off. But I have a feeling the 2014 group of women is going to break all the records.
I was interviewed for countless tele-summits and magazines. My writing was published. I retired my 1-on-1 coaching practice (more on why in an upcoming post). I met some truly amazing people. And I serve more people than ever before.
I’m humbled, grateful and exhilarated by this year.
Which is why I need a break. I need to integrate.
I realized this a month ago.
So, I’m in Thailand. For the entire month of February.
I’m not working. Not at all. No emails. No coaching. Nothing. I’m learning to be reliant on my team.
And this is one of the edgiest decisions I’ve made in recent history.
How the heck did this come about?
A few months ago, my dear friends Mike Hrostoski, Charmaine Haworth and Samuel Hershberger came to visit me in Panama for an epic 10 day Panama exploration. Stunning jungle views. Four hour long ocean-side chats that expand your world. Business and life.
Then we hatched this crazy idea—what if we lived in Thailand for a month?
I almost said no. I was terrified.
Thailand is 12-hrs ahead of the east coast 15-hrs ahead of the west coast.
What if people couldn’t reach me?
What if my team needed me urgently and I was asleep during the time they were awake?
What if all my clients got mad at me for not being available for a month?
What if my whole business crumbled while I disconnected to go within for a month and rest up?
What if people forgot about me?
Those were just some of the fears that came up for me.
But greater than my fears was a deep desire to experience such an incredible opportunity. This was another step into walking my talk.
So, I knew what I had to do—I came to Thailand.
Firstly because I badly needed the break and I have made a commitment to myself to love myself like my life depends on it.
Self care and time off is part of that.
I’d be a hypocrite if I told you to do that and I didn’t do it myself.
But most importantly I decided to go to Thailand because if I am here to support you in pushing up against your edges and limiting beliefs, then I have to constantly dive deeper into my own.
No matter how much personal development work you do, limiting beliefs/fears will never go away. It’s what we do with them that makes all the difference.
So, I made the proper arrangements…and here I am.
Just 7 days in here’s what I’ve learned so far from the fears that almost prevented me from coming here:
What if my clients/tribe/community gets mad at me for taking this break/not being available?
What really happened:
My clients were thrilled when they found out that I was going to Thailand.
I secretly had a fear that half of my client base would drop out in a fit of indignancy and rage.
Instead, many of my clients wrote me to tell me how inspired they are that I was able to take a month off.
It gave them new goals to add to their 2014 vision.
Some even sent me “have fun in Thailand” gifts!
(Seriously, I have the best clients ever).
What I learned:
I realized—would I even want to work with people who are not okay with me taking time off and don’t want me to create the life I desire to live?
Do I want to spend time with people who don’t want me at my most alive and instead want me depleted, sick and working 24/7?
The answer was “no”.
If anyone has a problem with you taking time to take care of yourself, then you have to ask yourself whether this is someone you want in your sphere anyway.
In the end, my decision to go to Thailand has become a model for my current and future clients who are trying to create the same for themselves.
Do the people you are choosing to have in your sphere cheer you on towards what’s best for you (vs. serving their own interests)?
If not, how can you spend more time with the right people and less time with the wrong people?
You don’t have to be a victim to anyone.
You get to pick the people who you spend time with.
Will my business crumble if I am not “in” it for a month?
What really happened:
I have spent the last year building a team that I can finally rely on.
Soon I will write a post on how I did that (and dish the dirt on the mistakes I made along the way).
I have an incredible Assistant, Client Care Specialist, Tech Assistant, Graphic Designer and Event Planner on staff and yet I was still putting all the responsibility on me, instead of surrendering control and trusting them to take deeper ownership of their roles in my company.
I was also burned out on managing 5 people, plus coaching clients, plus marketing, creating new programs, writing and everything else!
I realized I had to release control in order to allow more abundance in.
If I’m replenished and have the time/space to be in my zone of genius, my business can only benefit.
I needed to let my team have my back for a change.
But I didn’t see “how” just yet.
That time with them in addition to a great conversation with business priestesses Ali Shanti and Amrita Khalsa, helped me realize that I really needed to take the leap and hire a business manager once and for all.
If I was honest with myself, all I really wanted to do was strategize, write, coach and show up and do my great work.
I wanted someone else to do the rest.
But somehow I felt that was “impossible”.
Or like it was too diva-ish a move.
Shouldn’t I be tough enough to do it on my own?
Being around my community of Sisters who were doing it already or on their way to doing it as well, helped me realize I could do it too.
Within a week of being in Sisterhood with these women lovingly pushing me to take the leap, I had called up my tech VA and promoted him to Online Business Manager.
He was thrilled to accept and is managing my entire team spectacularly while I’m gone. And everyone else on my team has stepped. it. up.
That’s why I’m able to not work for an entire month while I’m in Thailand.
They’ve got my back.
What I learned:
Community and high level support is EVERYTHING.
No matter what you want to achieve in life, if you don’t have a community of people who support you in stepping into the new paradigms you want to step in to, it will be impossible to succeed.
From the dawn of time, human beings have thrived and survived because they have banded together in groups.
Any human who left the group, died.
I was worried that I “couldn’t afford” a business manager or that it would be irresponsible of me to surrender that much control of my business.
But having a community that was holding a higher intention for me helped me to challenge that belief and take the leap anyway.
They believed in my ability to do that way before I could.
And so, I was able to do it.
As far as the “I can’t afford it” fear, what I saw in my Sisters who had business managers, was that choosing to only spend time in their zone of genius has actually increased their income, because they are doing what they do best and not wasting time doing anything in their zone of mediocrity.
This is what’s possible when you have the right team to have your back and an incredible supportive community of people who are always holding the highest intention for you.
If you want high level support like this, you might want to consider joining my Fearless Feminine Leader™ Mastermind or its more cost-effective cousin the Impact Virtual Mastermind (hit “reply” to this email for more info on that one, as it’s an invite-only program that I privately launched with no website, we have only 2 spots left in that one).
Surrender and trust that the Universe has your back.
Whether it be in business or life, that’s a pretty solid tenet that I keep learning on deeper levels over and over again.
Take a good, honest look at your business and/or life.
Where are you needing to hire on more support, yet you keep coming up with excuses for why you can’t?
Get really honest with yourself about the true cost of going it alone.
If I’m not constantly producing, people will forget about me.
What really happened:
Now, it is important to regularly be in touch with your tribe and the people who need your services/thoughts/support because that is one of the keys to having a successful business.
But not at the expense of your physical, emotional and mental health.
We can take this “stay top of mind” scenario to the extreme and reach out constantly from a place of fear and contraction (“what if people forget about me? Then I’ll make no money and I”ll be a failure and my life will suck and”….see how easy it is to go down that rabbit hole?)
Here’s the truth—anything that comes from contraction will ultimately cause a contraction in your life and in your business.
Contraction is not sustainable in the long term.
Don’t believe me?
Try contracting every muscle in your body right now.
Now tell me, can you keep this up for 25 years?
There’s your answer.
What I do know is that thanks to Einstein’s discoveries, we know that the natural tendency of the Universe is to constantly expand.
So to make a decision from a place of expansion (vs a place of fear) means you are going with the flow of the Universe.
We all know what happens when you try to go against the flow.
My decision to not write you for the past 2 weeks, was scary at first, but it ultimately came from a place of expansion.
I wanted to challenge my fear that you would forget about me if I stopped writing you for a while, in greater service to you, myself and the world.
What I learned:
While it’s important to regularly keep in contact with your tribe, if it’s not genuinely feeling aligned to reach out in the moment (make sure your writer’s block is not self-sabotage!), then yes, by all means, take time off.
If you’re feeling burned out and need a break, forcing yourself to write something will only transmit the energy of contraction to your tribe.
People can feel when you’re out of alignment with your desires and as a result, won’t respond well to it anyway, so you’re better off not writing anything at all.
It’s better to take a break, charge up, then come back and reach out to your tribe from a place of replenishment and expansion.
The only reason I can write you this post today, is because I haven’t written you for 2 weeks. And I bet you’re getting some good stuff out of this post now aren’t you? 😉
Trust that the people who love you and are served by your work, will be there, even after a little break from reaching out to them. Anyone else who isn’t, just isn’t your tribe. Better to find out now than later.
Where in your life or business can you trust more?
Where are you pushing yourself, when what you really need is some time to go within and take care of yourself?
I’m 7 days in to Thailand and already the decision to push all of these fantastic edges and go head first into my fears has given me gifts galore, which I then get to happily turn around and give to you.
That’s my favorite part of this entire experience.
(And the fact that my business was running without me while I was on a motorcycle in Thailand the other day.)
Next week, I’ll tell you all about how I sprained my ankle and ended up in crutches just 3 days into my arrival in Thailand—I never thought spraining my ankle would be one of the best gifts of 2014, so stay tuned for that story.