When I finally convinced my junk-food-avoidant parents to let me buy a pack of this candy, I ripped the piece of candy from its wrapper, ran outside to eat it (so the fruit wouldn’t damage the roof of the house when it fell from the sky, of course) and waited.

Nothing happened. I was so disappointed. That’s when I learned sometimes our expectations don’t match reality. You know what else is like this? Our Purpose Capacity.

In the last few weeks we’ve been taking a journey through the Six Capacities as I share personal stories on how my own capacity has expanded in the last few years. I’ve shared things I’ve never spoken about publicly before. We’ve covered Money and Visibility. Now let’s talk about Purpose Capacity.

You’re allowed to change your mind…

I’ve always had a variety of different priced offerings in my business, but for the most part, the bulk of my clients were 1:1 clients who worked with me in a very high end container. While all of them told me the results they got were worth four times what they’d invested, something started nagging at me.

My vision for Capacity Work had never been to only share it with a few select leaders. I wanted millions to expand their capacity. But early in my business I’d tried a few $97 offers designed to host thousands. Some miscalculations by the team I hired to help me do this ended up putting my business in debt that year. It took me a year to recover from that.

Because in this one-to-many model I couldn’t vet everyone who signed up, I had a few experiences with customers so awful I decided to go back to a model where I could vet everyone. 

At the time, I simply didn’t have the Capacity for a one-to-millions business model. And that’s ok. We have the capacity we need for where we are until it’s time to grow that capacity to hold more. We’re not always ready for level 10 of our vision. And we can’t force it, either. That’s the biggest mistake I see people make: trying to force their biggest vision without honoring their pace. You can’t start out running a marathon, you have to train for it. You have to take small wins first to get the big wins.

Another issue I had at the time: I couldn’t see how to make the depth of work I do more accessible for different price points, because everyone has their own unique Capacity Code, so I couldn’t do the typical “cookie-cutter five step process” program most online personal development courses offered. It had to be something totally different from what I’d seen.

When I realized I had to shift my offerings to a variety of price points, my ego had a temper tantrum. I’d just finished leading two rounds of a program I trademarked called “The Empress Code” which taught leaders how to expand their Money Capacity and charge more for their work. Would I be labeled as a hypocrite if I offered a variety of price points now?

Luckily at the time one of my mentors reminded me of who I really am. She told me “this is YOUR business and you can do whatever you damn well please with it. If someone wants to act like you can’t adjust based on where your purpose is taking you, they’re just stuck in some old patriarchal BS.” She was right.

I define Purpose Capacity as your inside matching your outside. Is your purpose reflected in what you do? In the way you work? It became apparent to me back then my business model was no longer matching my PURPOSE. My Purpose Capacity needed expanding. 

While I still work with a select number of clients 1:1, I now have a variety of other offerings. Our $500 Virtual Capacity Retreats have all sold out multiple times and have waitlists. The $99 Capacity In Crisis Workshop surpassed our sign up expectations. And the Capacity Shift program (where you can work with me in a group of hand selected people for only $525 a month) was born and is humming along wonderfully.

And yeah, I managed to do this in a way where I STILL get to be selective about who comes into my sphere and create a safe space for the people who work with me. That’s the power of expanding your Purpose Capacity.

Is your inside matching your outside? Are you building something not aligned with your purpose? 

It might be time to work on your Purpose Capacity. You can fill out the Capacity Discovery Form here and if I feel what we offer can support you, we’ll reach out to schedule a call with me to discuss.

In our next blog post, I’m going to talk to you about how my Embodiment Capacity MAJORLY shifted in the last few years. There was some DRA-MA that went down on my way to stepping into my next level of this Capacity.

The post bonkers appeared first on Lisa Fabrega.

On Monday, I woke up to screaming. It was me, screaming at myself in my head, “My life is just beginning to get really good, this is only the beginning! I create my reality!”

It was the voice of my higher self (I call her my sovereign self) yelling at the voice of my tricky ego. And it must have been one hell of a battle in my sleep if she was laying down such fierce boundaries with my ego. 

Something happened to me when I turned 38. At the time, I searched online for other women who might have started to have this happen to them when they turned 38, too and I found NOTHING.

Weird voices I’d never heard before started creeping in. They said things like “no one’s going to want you when you get into your forties. It’s all downhill from there” and “no one will want to have children with you now because the older you get the more everyone will assume you’re not fertile”.

I started to have intermittent panic-wake-ups about this at 4am. I’ve always prided myself for being independent and going against the grain of what society deems to be “acceptable”. Yet here I was in the middle of the night being woken up by this involuntary and persistent sneaky thought my life was now “essentially over.” 

“What’s the point of setting these big goals if it was already too late for you? How dare you keep asking for your deepest desires after you’re “no longer valuable”? 

The most confusing part of all of this–at the same time I experienced one of the most profound self-love revolutions of my life. I woke up to a much deeper level of understanding my body was a tremendous gift. It frequently moved me to tears the amount of love, kindness and acceptance I felt for myself. 

I was deepening into my sovereignty and power like never before, yet every once in a while this little pesky voice would creep in and wake me. What felt REAL to me was the self-love revolution I was experiencing. Not the ego voices.

And then all of the suppressed grief and pain of the world erupted with the murder of George Floyd. And it erupted all the decades of grief and bottomless anger I’d been feeling myself over the murder and abuse of non-white, non-privileged people. 

Every time I saw one of these cases pop up in the news over the years, or another story of corruption from a billionaire white male who got away with it, yet a black man/woman killed in their sleep due to a police error or some minor infraction… 

Every time I saw another young white man (Brock Turner) get away with only three months of jail time for a brutal rape and heard a judge “feel sorry” for him, when Emmett Til was brutally murdered at 14 for “allegedly flirting” with a white woman who made the story up…

Every time a client shared a story of emotional, psychological or financial abuse from an industry leader leading “cult-like” masterminds…every time I saw yet another virtual summit or event filled with mostly only white speakers or white men…

Every time I saw a client doubt her worth and as a result make less money because of the false things the world and its systems had taught her about “her worth”…

I’d say to myself “I don’t know how much more of this we can take before we burn all of this sh&t to the ground.” And then there were finally fires burning while people rightfully raged and protested all over the world over George Floyd and CENTURIES of abuse.

And I was glad for it. It needs to burn. 

On Monday, the theme in all my coaching calls was Sovereignty (one of the pillars of Capacity Work). Specifically this: the ways we’ve been taught to give away our power and sovereignty to “systems” and authority figures which never earned our trust in the first place. 

One of those systems is toxic patriarchy. The other is white supremacy. And this is what needs to burn. SO MANY of the capacity issues I work on with leaders directly come from toxic patriarchy and colonialist ideals (which are rooted in white supremacy). If you’ve been here a while you’ve heard me talk about this ad-nauseum and mention it in many of my posts.

When I work on Money Capacity with my clients.. We have to talk about the issues they have with money (whether they’re making thousands or multiple millions) coming from all the effed up ideals colonizers set up and taught as “religion” to stop the slaves they exploited from rising up against them. The best way to control you financially is to teach you it’s somehow more holy or “good” to be poor and work your ass off for nothing.

It comes from the white men who benefit from these systems telling women they’re unattractive, intimidating or undesirable for making money, because they want to use money to maintain control. It comes from colonialist ideals which say only “certain, God-ordained” (aka white European men) people have a right to abundance.

When I work on Visibility and/or Emotional Capacity with my clients… we always talk about their fears of fully being seen in their work coming from old patriarchal ideals which say leaders must a) always be perfect and never mess up b) show no emotion c) always have the answer or at least pretend they do. 

Why do you think so many white entrepreneurs have horrendously botched their responses/lack of response to what’s happening in the world after they were rightfully called out? 

They had the “privilege” of not having to work on anti-racism work for years. And when they get called out, instead of just admitting “You’re right. I need to work on this and I was dead wrong”, they scramble to find clever ways of “covering up” they were imperfect. 

They call up PR firms to “maintain their image” instead of being willing to appear as a growing, imperfect human beings. In the colonial world, being imperfect equals death. Hence their obsession with “saving face”, because they don’t even realize they’re bought into the colonialist, systems of our world. I can guarantee you 99% of them don’t even SEE this is why they botched their responses so badly or stayed silent.

This is also why you’re terrified of someone not liking your work, or criticizing you when you become more “visible” or saying “who do you think you are?”. Because we’ve all been taught this lie we must be infallible and perfect at all times. Colonialist patriarchs set this system up so they could hold themselves as “knowing more than” and being “more powerful than” the people they oppressed. And the world bought it.

For every Capacity area I talk about with clients there is an effed up belief deep down in there related to these toxic systems which have been the foundations and scaffolding upon which our world has been built.

This is why it drives me insane when I hear from yet one more person “I know I need to work on my Capacity, but I’m going to hold off for now because of “insert excuse here”, so I need to focus more on my strategy/ad spend/business model right now.”

You think the toxic and oppressive systems inculcated into your brain cells from the moment you’re born don’t affect your capacity to build aligned wealth and create impact in the world? Think again.

Everywhere you look, from TV ads, to billboards, to the ways your salary is determined, to how marketing & sales gets taught to you, to the diet industry to the dating industry are constantly broadcasting to your subconscious the toxic messages of colonialist mentality.

Think about all the tiny unconscious actions you’re taking daily because some system or authority figure told you this is how you have to show up to “make it”. Think of all the ways those systems taught you you’re unworthy of your desires and to settle for less so those systems and its beneficiaries can reap all the rewards while you have to still buy into “hustle culture”.

Think of the ways those so-called authority figures became the little voice that tells you you don’t have the capacity to hold, handle and receive the big things you want to create and receive in the world. But certain “chosen ones” do. Starting to see it now?

All of the above are capacity issues. And they inform all of the areas in your work where you feel stuck, held back, frustrated or overwhelmed.

That’s why it’s not your strategy, it’s your capacity.

This is what I realized eventually about those nasty little voices telling me how worthless I was now I wasn’t in my twenties with zero wrinkles and a “perfect uterus”. It was the parts of me indoctrinated by those systems. It’s the colonizer installed in me at birth, wanting to devour my true, authentic self whole. 

And it’s my duty to send the colonizer voice within me packing. That’s why my sovereign self woke me up screaming. She was reminding it who’s in charge and telling it to take several seats.

It’s your duty to do this with yourself, too, especially if you’re someone with big goals of impacting the world with your work. Because the voice is always gonna try to stop you and get you to “conform”.

“Fixing your business model” is not the answer to this problem. Strategies don’t teach you how to send the voice packing and root it out of all the secret places it hides and controls your actions. 

But Capacity work will.

The post the nasty voice appeared first on Lisa Fabrega.

I walked into his office sure I was going to end up paralyzed or worse, dead. My first time visiting a chiropractor and all the doctors in my family who didn’t “believe” in chiropractic were texting me horror stories of adjustments gone wrong.

But I had this soul-hunch I needed to be there. I had tinnitus, an incessant ringing in my ear that was so madness-inducing I cried every day, and terrible migraines with neck pain for months. Yet, rather than invest the time and money into the chiropractor, I’d done this whole song and dance around it because it was “scary” and “different” than the ways I usually resolved these kinds of problems.

It took me being in severe pain to finally show up at his office. Within a few visits, I was no longer having the headaches, tinnitus was better and neck pain was gone. I decided I would go once a month from now on to prevent anything like that happening again. I invested in a year-long package and never had that level of pain and tinnitus again.

While I’m sure you have better things to do today than read about my chiropractic care, that’s not why I’m writing you this email. This story is a metaphor.

Because that incident from years ago got me thinking.  About how we wait til things are “really bad” until we’re willing to invest time, money and energy into a solution that will actually get to the root cause and truly “fix” the issue.

But sometimes when we wait til it’s REALLY bad, it’s too late or the recovery feels almost insurmountable (or super expensive) because the problem is already really far along.

A month ago, I spoke with a woman who’s been saying she wants to work with me for a year. I kept waiting for her to book a session to speak with me, but there was always some reason why she couldn’t… she was in another mastermind and not ready to make another investment just yet. She was moving houses, so too much on her plate. etc. etc.

Her business was always struggling with the same issues, but because it was making money and things were “pretty good”, she wasn’t motivated to make the investment to start working on the REAL issue yet: her Capacity.

When COVID-19 hit, everything changed.  You’ve probably heard me say a few times that the pandemic has EXACERBATED all the things that weren’t in alignment for us and has REALLY put it IN OUR FACES. 

Whatever you’ve been avoiding in your capacity can’t be anymore. All the weak spots in our lives and businesses are being highlighted. So this client finally booked a call with me because her revenue took a hit. She went from a usual revenue of $100,000 a month to $35,000 a month when the pandemic started. But I knew this was coming a year ago when she first wrote me about the small struggles her business was having. 

To make matters more stressful, her own clients were freaking out about THEIR clients freaking out about making their payments. And that was causing her payments to get delayed, too. To put it crassly, it was a clusterf&ck. All of her boundary capacity and money capacity issues were rearing their heads and in. her. face.  

I feel paralyzed Lisa, she said to me on the phone. She knew this was a moment that required greater capacity from her than ever before. She knew she had to show up as a model of capacity for her own clients, so THEY wouldn’t freak out and in turn could hold space for their OWN clients to not freak out.  And she didn’t feel like she had it in her. 

Instead she was flailing, not knowing what to do, not showing up for her clients in an empowering way that kept them level-headed and it was affecting her revenue big time.

Last year I thought money was a concern when I was wanting to invest in working with you, but I wish I’d signed up then because the money concerns are way scarier now. And now I have to make an investment decision from a place of greater financial stress.

That’s exactly what happened to me when I ignored the soul hunch to go to the chiropractor regularly months before my neck pain got out of hand. I wished, too, that I’d gone earlier before the problem became so big it required massive amounts of treatment.

Thankfully, she realized that if she just waited til “things got better”, like she’d already been doing for a year, she’d be in this exact same situation again, very soon. So it was now or never. 

Sometimes that’s what good leadership requires from you. Good leaders have the CAPACITY to make scary decisions that are good for the long term health of their companies, even during times of financial stress. 

She just texted me last week to tell me that in just the last three weeks of us working together, they’ve gone from $35,000 a month in revenue to on track for $70,000.  DURING a pandemic. Capacity work changed how she showed up for her community and in turn, they relaxed and made more empowered money decisions (instead of hoarding in fear.) 

If you aren’t liking how you’re showing up right now and want to react to all of this in a more empowered way, I’ll tell you what I told her. Cause you know I’m always gonna give it to you straight with a lot of love.

Your capacity issues are in your face right now for a reason. It’s time to deal with them NOW. I realize the inconvenience of this during a time when you’re managing other stressors…

But if you finally deal with this NOW, in 6 months you can be somewhere totally different and better than where you are right now because you chose to face the sh$t that is up in your face for examination and you worked on it, even though it was scary.

Or, you can be doing the same sh$t you were doing before, struggling with the same things you are struggling with now, using the same coping mechanisms and find yourself facing the same problems yet again. 

Only this time it will be worse because we’re getting another, worse wave of this then. Every single expert on pandemics in the world has said this. What we’re experiencing now is NOTHING compared to what we’re going to get hit with in the fall. 

It’s not fear mongering that I’m telling you this. It’s good common business sense. And a good business owner or career warrior can see upcoming patterns and adjust to make sure that when they hit, they’re already in a strong position and AHEAD of the wave.  

I was JUST watching Mark Cuban, a billionaire entrepreneur, talking about how right now is actually one of the BEST times for businesses. Because during times like these, those who can innovate and do things differently, stand out. It’s those who are willing to DO THINGS DIFFERENTLY than they normally do who will succeed and thrive during this time.

But being able to do that requires CAPACITY. 

Which one of the above scenarios will you be? Because the choices you make now will determine where you are when the tide turns again in the fall. 

You’re either gonna be ready or not. You either get that or you don’t. You’re either going to have the CAPACITY to handle it or you won’t. You don’t get “a little bit pregnant.” You’re either pregnant or you’re not. Same goes for capacity.

Choosing to move forward into capacity work is always going to feel like a leap. If it’s not a pandemic, there’s something else stressful that will be going on for you. Times of stress, important decisions– they’ll always bring up your old coping mechanisms because the wiser part of you wants to see if you’re REALLY ready to stop using old crutches and do things anew.

And the moment you leave your old behaviors you rely on behind, is the moment the doors to more possibilities and more abundance open up. 

(I recently had a client sign up to work with me on her capacity–as a result weeks later quit her job and almost immediately received a job offer for more money, in her dream field and now has a huge media company chasing her to do a podcast with her!)

In a few days I want to talk with you about another question I get asked all the time “how do I know if an investment is the right one for me?” 

I answered this question for a client on a group coaching call recently and everyone was blown away by what we discussed. Stay tuned for my thoughts on that in a few days.

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