“too fat” and “too old”


lisa fabrega

All day Monday, I coached clients by phone. These womxn have varying backgrounds and levels of success from $50k in revenue a year to $1 million. Do you know what we talked about all day?


As imperfect.
As vulnerable.
Fear that others were going to judge the new thing they are putting out there.
That if they let themselves be FULLY seen or showed up online how felt best to them, no one would buy what they’re offering.
Or their thoughts were “too different and controversial” to post.
They’d get angry comments.
Or they wouldn’t be “approved of” by colleagues and/or former clients.

In all cases this is how they were unknowingly hiding from being seen (see how many of these you can check off for yourself when you read them):

  • Hiding behind their old branding to avoid showing the world their FULL selves.
  • Sharing and writing the same content or ideas that had “always worked” because they were too afraid to share what was really in their hearts.
  • Avoiding making a video, booking a speaking gig or taking new photos because they were afraid of what they “look like on camera,” afraid of “looking too old” or “too fat.”
  • Procrastinating, then wondering why clients and opportunities aren’t coming as easily as they thought they would.
  • Paying lots of money to a publicist/publicity program, booking podcasts and conferences yet not seeing the results they want. The publicity people they were working with were great, nothing was wrong with the speaking opportunities. Something ELSE was off.
  • Sabotaging opportunities to raise their prices or ask for a raise because they didn’t want old clients or colleagues to ‘judge’ them for having the ‘audacity’ to charge those prices/ask for that amount.
  • Spinning their wheels trying to figure out what their ‘new branding’ should be so people “get” what they do, yet feeling foggy about it all. Hiring branding experts when they weren’t ready to, therefore losing momentum and money.

ALL of these things, whether you’re doing only one of them, all of them or some other ones that aren’t on this list, slow your growth, wealth & success down.

And they’re a sign that you have a Visibility Capacity issue.

(Even if you’re reading and going, “Not me! Things are going great right now! I’m super visible!” – I’m speaking to you too, sister. No matter where you are in your career, this will come up at every new level of visibility.)

In ten years of working with thousands of womxn, I’ve not come across a single womxn who was fully ready for her next level of Visibility Capacity. Why?

Because most of what we’re taught about being visible is all about strategy. Publicity plans. The right funnel. Having the right branding and photos. Getting the killer marketing languaging, etc…

But what good is your best strategy if you haven’t yet created the CAPACITY within yourself to receive, hold and handle ALL the bigger and newer visibility that strategy will bring you?

What good is the best publicist, marketing plan or branding on the planet if you’re subconsciously sabotaging the opportunities she/he gets you because you don’t have the capacity to receive them?

In fact, many women I speak to are experiencing this issue with their visibility right now – no matter what level of success they’ve experienced financially. They often tell me they’ve tried everything, but it’s not quite working as it should. Why?

Because there’s a wide chasm between:

Being visible



Being fully seen is VISIBILITY CAPACITY. So many of us are still holding parts of us back from our work. Whether one year into our careers/businesses or twenty years in. And when we do that we hold back the parts of us that have the potential to be the most lucrative!

I was just speaking to a woman yesterday who has been running her business for fifteen years. She had the best year in her business EVER last year. BUT this year has been plateauing and now down-sliding. Her clients this year aren’t as aligned as they were last year, so it’s not as fun for her to show up for her coaching as it used to be. When we dug deeper she realized she has a major Visibility Capacity issue.

This issue is SO IMPORTANT, I decided to try out an idea last year and hosted a virtual Visibility Capacity retreat. Y’all went wild and the retreats SOLD OUT.

After the retreats were over, I was blown away by the reaction of those who attended and the results that so many women had:

  • One woman wrote to tell me she signed two clients after the call.
  • Another got off the call and booked five podcasts, after procrastinating on it for months.
  • Another wrote a post that went viral because she finally let herself BE SEEN as a result of the work we did in the Visibility Capacity Retreat.

Here’s a post one of the excited attendees posted on my Facebook wall after attending:


So, to get your year started off RIGHT…

I’m hosting three new Virtual Visibility Capacity Retreats.


I’m not doing some huge launch for this with millions of emails and a fancy enrollment page. I’m keeping this heart-to-heart and simple. I can only take up to 10 women for each virtual retreat because I want to make sure you get lots of good coaching time with me.

Oh, and it’s first-come, first-serve. We opened this up to our interest list on Monday and already x spots are taken.

And because Visibility Capacity is such a hugely important issue that we ALL need to be talking about, I’m offering it for only $500, because I want it to be accessible to everyone serious about taking action on this once and for all.

Visibility Capacity is a huge reason why womxn hold back their impact and their earning potential at every level of their success.

What you need to know:

  • This is a VIRTUAL retreat, which means you don’t have to leave your home to attend. Just join us via Zoom (video teleconference). Once you sign up, my team will send you the details to join us.
  • We’ll spend 4 hours together (don’t worry, there’s a lunch break). You and an intimate group of no more than 8 women, diving deep into YOUR specific Visibility Capacity issue and expanding it for your next level.
  • You’ll get a Hot Seat session with me during the retreat, where all the focus is on you, so bring your most complicated, puzzling visibility issue to the table so we can work it out together.
  • You will be coached by me throughout the retreat as well as witness other womxn be coached (you’ll often find that watching others be coached helps you resolve things you didn’t even know you had going on). I don’t do talking-head style teaching – my retreats are interactive and co-creative.

Here’s just some of what we will cover in the Visibility Capacity Virtual Retreat:

  • Exactly how YOU particularly are holding your Visibility Capacity back. Learn where YOU particularly need to expand your visibility and what’s REALLY getting in your way of being seen (it’s never what you think).
  • Walk away feeling confident that your visibility could triple tomorrow and you’d have NO PROBLEM handling it AND maximizing the opportunities that come your way.
  • Why your strategies haven’t been working, and a technique that will ensure your visibility strategies will work like you’ve been wanting them to.
  • Get clear on who you really are in the world, what your unique gift is and how to express that in a way that allows you to be FULLY SEEN. When we see ALL of you, that’s when your impact and income really take off. (Even if you know clearly what you’re here to do and already have a “brand,” this particular exercise will give you a richer, deeper clarity which will add extra shine to how you’re already showing up.)
  • Why you might be attracting clients, people or opportunities in your life that represent unhealed parts of you or aren’t aligned with you (aka problem/triggering clients). And how to start attracting more of the RIGHT opportunities and/or clients.
  • Clearing fear of putting yourself out there on a bigger scale and ending the self-sabotage that keeps you hiding from your next level of visibility.
  • Any other visibility issue you are having that you need support with — this is an interactive retreat with lots of time for coaching, so you can bring it all to the table. (It’s impossible for me to list all the visibility issues known to humanity in one email.)

If you’re ready to do visibility work unlike anything you’ve seen, that’ll get you the results you’ve already “tried everything” to get, then join us.

You can pick from one of three dates:

Thursday, January 23, 11am – 3pm PT (2pm ET – 6pm ET) (8 spots left)
Saturday, February 1, 10am – 2pm PT (1pm ET – 5pm ET) (10 spots left)
Friday, February 7, 11am – 3pm PT (2pm ET – 6pm ET) (9 spots left)

If you have any questions, feel free to hit ‘reply’ and we’ll be happy to answer them!

Also, this is first-come, first serve. When they’re gone, they’re gone.

In love, capacity and VISIBILITY,

PS: I’m going to be lovingly frank — if none of these dates work for you, and your next level of visibility, wealth and impact are important to you, I know you’ll move around what you need to in order to be there. You know when you truly prioritize something, you will do what you’ve gotta do to make it happen. For the last virtual retreat I offered, a woman moved her entire client schedule the NIGHT BEFORE the retreat so she could attend.